Written in August 2017
Gorilla Monsoon welcomes us to the show and just hearing Monsoon’s voice makes me know we’re in for a fun evening. He’s joined not by Bobby “the Brain” Heenan or Jesse “the Body” Ventura but by “Mean Gene” Okerlund and “Lord” Alfred Hayes. Still, the chemistry should be okay. (I mean it’s not like it’s Hayes and Craig DeGeorge or Sean Mooney.)
Just because I like to know these things, I checked DriverAverages.com and found out that this show took place on the Monday after NASCAR raced at Rockingham. Neil Bonnett won the Nationwise 500. Dale Earnhardt finished 6th. Full results are here:
The three commentators put over the exciting evening they have in store, including a tag team battle royale. As we get ready for our opener, we see Howard Finkle in the ring, mentioning something about how you can get ejected from the Garden.
Speaking of the opener, Hulk Hogan’s buddy, Brutus Beefcake (for whom the jokes write themselves) vs. real estate agent B. Brian Blair. The commentators talk about how Wrestlemania II was a nightmare for the Dream Team, some six months later. In 2017, six months would mean at least three different storylines later.
Cool move during the match as Blair has an armbar on Beefcake. Bruti slams Blair but the latter still hangs on to the armbar. Also an interesting moment as Monsoon mentions the injury to Mean Gene’s son, Todd, who played in the NHL for the New York Islanders. (I remember reading that the younger Okerlund played pro hockey back in the day.)
Beefcake controls about 80% of the match. Blair gets a comeback but comes off the ropes with high-cross body but Beefcake uses the momentum to reverse things and uses a handful of tights for a cheap win.
Not sure if Tama was over enough in 1986 to prevent a mass exodus to the snack bar but he’s got an uphill battle against Moondog Rex. Once the bell rings, they do have a good storyline of the brawling big man against the exciting youngster. Basically, this is pretty close to what Jimmy Snuka vs. Rex would have been a year or so earlier.
Sorry but I was working on other things and missed commentating on the match. However, I did look up to see Tama come off the top rope with a flying bodypress to get the victory. I don’t think anyone was expecting a different result – even in October 1986.
King Kong Bundy, who was the bane of my existence last weekend as I tried to defeat him in WWE 14’s recreation of the Wrestlemania II cage match, takes on the Super Machine. I always figured that was Jimmy Snuka under the mask but I can see now his skin tone was too light. Instead, it was the Masked Superstar – aka Bill Eadie – aka Demolition Ax.
Funny – to me – moment when one of the commentators (I forget who) called Bundy “The Rock of Gibraltar”. Does that mean when Bundy was wrestling in Gibraltar, he’d come out with a Hawaiian shirt, give the People’s Eyebrow and deliver promos where he says “FINALLY, King King Bundy…has come BACK to Gibraltar”?
Despite the weight difference, the Machine gets in his shots on Bundy, but a reversal of the Irish Whip gives Bundy the opening for the avalanche and the victory. I think the whole Machines gimmick was dying down at that point. (In retrospect, it was like the NWO. It was interesting in the beginning but then everyone started joining in – Hulk Machine, Piper Machine – and then it fizzled. Unlike the NWO, however, they didn’t keep the Machines going for years on end.)
Okay, now here’s something we can get behind: The Dynamite Kid vs. Jim “the Anvil” Neidhart. Awww…Kid is bringing Matilda, in a British Bulldogs T-shirt. Never realized how much Dynamite Kid looks like Finn Balor.
While the British Bulldogs vs. the Hart Foundation was at its best as a tag team feud, these two guys give a good accounting of themselves in the singles scene. The Kid shows why he’s so respected above and beyond just what he did in the WWE with a great dropkick off the top rope.
Awesome finish as Neidhart ducks out of the way of the Kid and assumes he’s gone out to the floor. Instead, Dynamite someone maneuvers through the ropes and gets Neidhart with a cradle rollup for the win.
The Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff are in the ring when we return as the Sheik will take on Jacques Rougeau, who comes to the ring in his face entrance gear which makes him look like a boxer. The Sheik gets on the mic but sadly, keeps it PG, telling the crowd to not chant “USA! USA!” If you think about it, the Sheik’s being smart, as a USA chant would be stupid since Rougeau is from Canada so the crowd would basically be chanting for…the ref, maybe?
I love the Sheik’s follow up as he does his traditional “Iran #1, Russia #1” but follows it up with “Canada – acht-ptu!” Of course, knowing what I know about American crowds, that probably just turned the Sheik face.
It takes a while for the Sheik to even get out of his ring robe as the action starts off fast and never really lets up. Jacques gets the upper hand for much of the middle of the match. The Sheik does come back and gets his as-per-usual not-correctly-applied abdominal stretch and Rougeau gets the hip toss, but the Sheik continues to have the advantage for a bit but things start to go back and forth.
The crowd does get the USA! chant going so I guess there is some love for the ref after all.
Rougeau comes over the top rope with a sunset flip for the win. Solid match and probably would have been a good opener.
The next match is…not a match. Instead, it’s a live version of Piper’s Pit. As Piper comes out, he acknowledges his heel past. Wow…did he just call Adrian Adonis a f*g (bleeped out of course)? Wrestling really wasn’t as PC in 1986.
Piper also talks about the Mets being down 2 games in the World Series. (This was the infamous Mets-Red Sox series that led to the Bill Buckner play in Game 6.) After a lengthy preamble, he calls out Bobby the Brain Heenan and Paul Orndorff. Heenan comes out alone. Heenan riles up the crowd and Piper bets him $10,000 the Mets take the Series. (Kinda fun watching this with 20/20 hindsight of history.)
Piper and Heenan insult each other and then Heenan gives what he terms a proper introduction. (It’s like a better version of Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar appearing on Miz TV.) Orndorff and Piper are ready to battle and start arguing over whether the other could get a tag partner. I remember hearing about this back in the day. so it’s no surprise when it’s Harley Race to tag with Orndorff and Piper tagging with Hulk Hogan. This went on waaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy too long.
Mike Rotundo (or Rotunda or Captain Mike or IRS or whoever) vs. Jumping Jim Brunzell in a face-vs-face match, although I think they were teasing Rotundo turning heel before heading to Florida and eventually Jim Crockett Promotions/WCW. Match is barely underway and they are already hinting that Rotundo may use some heelish tactics to win in MSG. Indeed, as the match goes on, you can see Rotundo working less and less in the scientific manner in which both guys were hyped as using early in the bout.
Rotundo and Brunzell go over the top rope and hit the floor on the outside. They come up just short of getting back into the ring and so it’s a double-countout.
Matilda makes her return to MSG (from earlier this evening) as Davey Boy Smith takes on Greg “The Hammer” Valentine. As you might expect, this is another solid match. It occurs to me that matches like this are fondly remembered because you didn’t have the disgruntled IWC complaining about everything. Smith has the powerslam for the win only to have Valentine get his foot on the rope.
Later, Valentine gets Smith in a figure four leglock but Smith gets to the ropes. Valentine does get the win with a cradle of some sorts but as the ref is counting Smith down, the Hammer grabs the top rope for leverage. The commentators are suitably upset. From Smith vs. Valentine, we go to
S.D. Jones vs. Moondog Spot. Quite honestly, I was working on my To Do list of getting CD labels for my collection of old NASCAR races. I just let Spot and Jones play in the background.
To give you an idea of how thrilling the match is, mid-way through Mean Gene congratulates Gorilla Monsoon on “the coming nuptials.” At first I was like “It wasn’t until 1986 that Gorilla got married?” but it turned out to be his daughter. Nice shot as Monsoon says the groom “better behave himself.”
In the ring, Spot comes off the top rope with a flying elbow that would make Randy Savage…well, lose his lunch, probably. Jones gets out of the way and follows up a flying headbutt for the pin, although it does look like Spot may have kicked out. The commentators says that it was “a definite three-count.”
In what might be a more classic match with some historical perspective, Haku takes on Nikolai Volkoff. In 2017, you have more respect for Haku’s brawling ability. Haku disrupts Volkoff’s national anthem. Haku gives a good accounting for himself. Not sure if this was a meeting of different trajectories, as Haku was still a youngster while Volkoff was just starting a downturn (although he did feud with Hacksaw Jim Duggan when he came in from the UWF and later teamed then feuded with Boris Zukhov.)
Volkoff hit the turnbuckles, allowing Haku to cradle him for a disputed three count. A rare moment in the 80s (and totally unheard of today) where the commentators criticize the face for a sloppy cover.
Okay, after a couple of blah matches, we should get back on track (at least in terms of the match-up) as Bret Hart takes on Raymond Rougeau. Bret shows less of the Excellence of Execution and more pounding and brawling in the opening moments.
Some dumb-ass in the crowd decides to chant “boring” showing that even without the Internet, there were still morons out there. Whether responding to the crowd or not, the pair of Canadians decided to kick it up a notch.
Hart takes a page out of Greg Valentine’s Wrestlemania playbook, scooping Rougeau’s legs and using the corner turnbuckle for leverage. Okay, we’ve got 17 minutes left and there’s a tag team battle royale plus didn’t Gorilla say Hogan and Orndorff were going to main event?
Anyways, this is why the card has been full of matches like Volkoff vs. Haku, etc. Finkle starts to introduce the12 teams including the Moondogs, the Rougeaus, the Dream Team, Steve Gatorwolf and Chief Jay Strongbow, the Hart Foundation, Rotundo (introduced as just that “Rotundo”) and S.D. Jones, the Islanders, Nikolai Volkoff and the Iron Sheik, the Killer Bees, the Machines, the British Bulldogs (who, as champions, should have come out last) and “Giant” (formerly Big) John Studd and King Kong Bundy.
The Moondogs are out almost immediately. Lots of action with no real consequence for a while as guys try to toss one another over the top rope. I would have thought the teams would have all ganged up on Bundy and Studd. (I think they did that once.)
By the way, I should point out this is the second house show I reviewed where the main event was a tag team battle royale. S.D. Jones and Mike Rotundo are eliminated but Rotundo doesn’t seem to want to leave. Gatorwolf and Strongbow (who came out of retirement for the bout, they say) are eliminated. The Iron Sheik is eliminated due to Volkoff somehow and gets injured with a gash to the back of the head in the process.
Eliminations are now coming hot and heavy with the British Bulldogs and the Hart Foundation eliminated simultaneously. The Rougeaus, with help from Haku and Jim Brunzell try to eliminate Bundy (see that was the smart move) but King Kong remains in the ring.
The Killer Bees are eliminated and the Islanders and Rougeaus are taking on each other in another face vs. face battle. It is Big or Giant John Studd who eliminates the Rougeaus.
The Dream Team follow shortly after. One of the Machines nearly slams Studd but then they are eliminated so it is down to the Islanders and the team I dubbed the Titans (Big John Studd and King Kong Bundy). Bundy has a viscous look on his face as the two teams face off.
They have been talking all show about how Bundy and Studd are the “odds-on favourites” so I think we know how this is going to end. Haku gets the better of Studd but while Tama gets a shot or two in against Bundy, he gets an avalanche. With Tama out of commission, Bundy and Studd start to work over Haku, only for the Islander to duck out of the way and Bundy to crash into Studd causing the latter to topple over the top rope.
As I expected, the Islanders get the win in the battle royale. I guess with two minutes or so left, the World title match is not happening. (Or Hogan is doing “the fingerpoke of doom” a dozen years early.)
Not a whole lot in terms of post-game wrap-up as Gorilla sends us off the air. Interesting format that I had seen before with a bunch of tag wrestlers in singles matches. Okay when it’s Bret Hart vs. Raymond Rougeau or Greg Valentine vs. Davey Boy Smith but not great when it’s Tama vs. Moondog Rex or Spot vs. S.D. Jones. The Piper-Orndorff encounter went on way too long but fun to see Heenan and Piper talking about the World Series. I wonder if Piper ever got his $10,000.
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